merry belated christmas

this christmas season came and went far too fast. its the best time of the year, even through all the stress and frustration and anxiety of present shopping and money spending--this year, i had the worst of it. i managed to go about 320 negative in my account, which forced me to apply for a credit card to save my ass. even though i know presents and such arent the real reason for the season, i love seeing the people i love smile. being negative just means extra hours.. or in my case, getting a job

anyway, santa dropped this baby under the tree for me :)

YEEEEE!

nikon d40. un freakn believable! if only you saw my reaction, you'd know how appreciative i was/am of this gift :)))

this christmas marks as one of the most memorable. it was the tuffest, yet the sweetest. i love the people that are in my life, and i am truly truly blessed.

hope yours was wonderful too :)

thank you, american apparel

i love clothing so cheap the shit might as well be free!

the other sunday, me and the man went to the american apparel factory flea market where they were offering, no joke, mountains and mountains of clothes from $1 - 10. in fucking sane!

we waited 2.5 hours to get our hands on these goods and of course came out like champs. after elbowing people, diving in piles, and playing a few games of tug-o-war, between the two of us, we scored more than $200's worth of goodies

[the unbelievably long line]

this event landed right in time for finals, so sacrificing a whole day cost me hours of sleep and crucial paper-writing time. luckily i was able to cross people off my Christmas present-buying list which was the initial reason for going. but the best part: i only spent money on gas, food, and the dollar admission.

i just love a good deal!

what a bust

my laptop died on me :(

i have the worst luck with all electronics or anything expensive

r.i.p.

after much speculation between the bf and i, we finally got the confirmation that the blood brothers split via their myspace blog. twas a sad sad day for many :(

[their last cd cover, young machetes. thinking about getting this crazy bitch as my next tattoo.]

the seattle based band ended their ten year romp over who knows why, except because "[their] time together has come to an end." their sound embodied genres from post-hardcore, experimental, punk, art punk, and, to my ears, even a little bit of hip hop. they rest on 5 cd's, a couple eps, and a massive, loyal fan base that will miss their music dearly.

i feel fortunate that i was able to open my ears to them. they performed at coachella 2005 and me and the bf happened to be resting in their tent. when they started playing we were like wtf is this shit?! and ran out. a year later we rediscovered their music, i forget why, but thank God we did. their intense screaming and chaotic sound can turn one off at first, but once you get past the judgments and really listen.. damn. they're dope. through them i harbored a new found respect, love, and craving for the genre, for good quality screaming and genius-made music. their sound is hardly comparable, if at all.. and dont even get me started on their performances! their vibe was so fucking fierce, again, incomparable to many bands i've heard/seen.

[blurry pictures]

all in all, the blood brothers was one of the greatest bands that have come across my plate. the unrivaled voice of johnny whitney will live on through his side project jaguar love, a generic version of the phenoms.

r.i.p. blood brothers

who's next?

luca

"REMEMBER, REMEMBER THE 5TH OF NOVEMBER"


anyway, before he gets any bigger, i wanted to share pics of my new pup.
and by the looks of it, he'll be full grown come tomorrow morning.

a new teammate of mine brought one of the pups around and said his friend was giving them away. so i actually got the number for my bf. after the whole bruno situation he'd been wanting another doggie, but it somehow ended up becoming ours.

so without further adieu, id like to introduce luca!
the name's derived from one of our favorites songs on brand news newest album the devil and god are raging inside me AND just so happens to be a character on the Godfathah series.. which I LOVE. too bad luca brasi's the dumb one in the film. dumb but ever so sweet.


:)

as of 10.30.07

i am an official GUERILLA UNION intern :)

[click]

FINALLY! i get a damn break!

GU is the live events company that has brought to you concerts such as rock the bells, paid dues, and smokeout. google them. go to them.

after numerous emails, phone calls, and months gone by, i finally got the reply asking for my help with this project. and eventually, i got offered the internship. theres a lot more shit that went down between each point, but i'll spare you the overwhelming details which i tend to do when storytelling.

for what has seemed like forever, ive been trying to land this kind of position so its pretty fucking exciting :)

wish me luck!

scary

california's on fire.



























Southern California Wildfires

In October 2007, over a dozen wildfires across Southern California, United States forced the evacuation of thousands of residents. This evacuation comes almost four years to the day after the Cedar Fire of 2003.
At least one person has been reported dead.
Fires burned in Malibu, Lake Arrowhead, Irvine, San Diego, and many other places. California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger declared a state of emergency in Los Angeles, Orange, Poway, Riverside, San Bernardino, San Diego, Santa Barbara, and Ventura counties as a result.
This is the worst case of wildfires Southern California has ever had.

Think of all the people that have lost their homes.
Pray these fires die down soon.
Pray for the firefighters and their safety.


this redundant cycle of taking things for granted and then appreciating them once a tragedy strikes is a tragedy in itself. the saddest part is we're all a part of it.

when we're living the bad life, we fail to count what makes life good.
when we're living the good life, we still fail to count what makes life good.

we all go through each day without thanks to even the littlest things. everyone knows its easier to count the things that have done you wrong and to dwell on them.

but dont get me wrong. im always down to listen to someones problems and be the one to vent to, but dont try to make the longest list of sorrows looking for some kind of credit or praise for having to go through the worst bullshit. just smile and move the fuck on.

it shouldnt take a fire to realize what we got before its gone.

[i kinda went off on a tangent there.. seems like all this fire talk brought out a little personal gripes!]

be safe everyone!

bruno's story

[ EDIT ]
warning: very, very long post.
in short: the system is flawed and heartless. a potentially happy ending ended in nothing short of tragic. read on..

thursday, october 4th
we meet bruno on our front porch at the fily house, tagless, hungry, and oh so freakn sweet :) i had no idea he was a pit bull, otherwise i would've been more hesitant to take him in. but we did anyway, and made him a home in our dirt backyard. later that night we name him bruno. along with 5 other names that we cant decide on.

friday, october 5th
we become more acquainted with bruno and learn a lot about him. for instance, he loves to play fetch with tennis balls, but then eventually rips them open. he gives really strong hugs to the point where they're kinda scary. he loves people and loves company and cries whenever we leave.

i make the mistake of telling my parents we're housing him. obviously they're pissed bc the only thing they know about pits is that they're vicious and will bite our face off. so on their demand we get rid of him. but instead we bring him to the bf's backyard where its more suitable for him anyway. there he upgrades from a tennis ball to a soccer ball (which we find out he likes to rip open also) and from the dirt ground to a couch, so its perfect.

sunday, october 7th
we make a vet visit to check his health and if he has a microp chip. he leaves with good health but no microship so our hopes of finding his owners are shot, but at that moment it was ok cus we were pretty set on taking him in. while waiting our turn me and the bf read a sign regarding strays being "humanely destroyed." afterwards we made the decision that turning him into the shelter was definitely not an option.

we bring back to adams backyard and say goodnight.

monday, october 8th
4pm - bruno's gone. after my class we drive to adams to play with our new pup, but he wasnt there. we're confused making calls to all his roommates asking endless questions. at this time im in a silent panic, sitting on the couch where bruno sleeps wondering where the fuck he is. we start thinking maybe the gardners stole him, or even the neighbors (cus we heard crying coming from their backyard). but of course they didnt. we drive for hours, talk to neighbors, and find out he's been seen in the early morning, around 10 or 11, walking around looking lost and confused.

6pm - we end up calling the riverside animale shelter. they tell us a report has been made from an apartment complex across the street where adams lives about a dog that sounds exactly like bruno. but we wont find out until tomorrow if it really is him. our hopes are high again and i can finally stop crying. but the wait kills us.

tuesday, october 9th
me n adam arrive at the animal shelter scared to shits that the report might not have been about bruno. we end up in a long hallway hearing the muffled sounds of dogs barking. people are walking in and out of doors calling for their pets, some crying, and we join them. the place is loaded with stray dogs, crying, scratching at their cages, staring at you pass them by. finally in the last room, in the very last cage, we find our bruno wide-eyed and shaking at the sound of the other dogs' yells. we try to take him home but we cant cus he was never ours to begin with. we cant even play with him. so we sign up to adopt him, and they tell us to come back in 5 days.

wednesday, october 10th and thursday, october 11th
inbetween classes, we visit bruno for an hour at a time. he has such a big personality. he holds our hands through a small gap in the bottom of the cage. we scratch him behind his ears and play hide-n-seek with him. its a heartbreaking sight--like seeing your kid in jail--but we're happy he's alive and safe. everytime we leave i cry, and he watches us walk away until he cant see us anymore. but still, we're excited to take him home and get him out of such a horrible place.

friday, october 12th
we arrive at the shelter ready to take bruno home only to find out he's ineligible for adoption bc he didnt pass his "safer test" (a set of tests to check his behavior and reactions in different situations). we're told he was aggressive and tried to bite, which confused us bc he's never showed signs of aggression or anger and has only been sweet and obedient to everyone he was around. we're told the next step is to wait until a Resuce will pick him up (a place where they train animals until they are fit to be adopted). we're also told they don't practice euthanasia, so we have nothing to worry about. we go home terribly sad and still unable to play, pet, or hug him.

saturday, october 13th
i attempt to get in contact with the supervisor of the Behavior staff at the shelter. i wanted to ask questions regarding Bruno about his safer test and why we think he reacted the way he did bc of his experience in the shelter--we think its because he was more than likely scared and threatened. i wanted them to do the test over. but no answer, no call back.

monday, october 15th
we find out that all dogs with a grade F on their safer test are put in the same room and is closed off to the public so now we cant ever see him. i start thinking about the last time we saw him and regret not staying any longer.

i receive a call back from christy, one of the staff members of Behavior. she tells me his aggression was towards dogs, not humans, which clarifies a lot for me. she tells me a rescue will more than likely not pick him up bc they are at full capacity for pit bulls. she tells me if a resuce doesnt pick him up, he will be euthanized. she tells me im not allowed to adopt him bc they cannot adopt out an animal that has an F on their safer test. i ask her endless questions and all she can tell me is no and/or sorry. i begin to look for rescues in the southern california area that will be interested in him. my efforts fail bc these rescues have to be approved with the rside shelter first. and i cant stop crying.

tuesday, october 16th
im on campus when i get a call back from christy saying no rescue will pick him up bc of his size and his aggression towards other animals. she gives me the confirmation that he's going to be euthanized.

directly after, she puts me on hold for a good 2 minutes. she comes back and says i can adopt him only on the condition that i will undoubtedly keep him and take care of him. i would also have to get my landlord to fax the rental agreement to the shelter and personally write on it that he is aware of the pitbull's agression. we hang up and i call my landlord while she confirms this agreement with her supervisor. my landlord, of course, says there is no way he can allow me to house a pitbull. they both express their deepest sorrows, which to me is a bunch of bullshit. and i cant stop crying.

wednesday, october 17th
adams roommate tells me he's in the process of becoming a dog trainer, and says he would take bruno in as one of his "clients." i call the animal shelter, go right past christy and ask to speak to her supervisor, where i am told that his work needs to be approved as a rescue, and he needs to be able to adopt him under the same conditions that had for me. his work isnt approved and he's not able to adopt him. so again, my hopes are shot. i fail. and im out of things i can do.

october 17th or 18th
bruno's "humanely destroyed"

r.i.p. baby bruno

[ EDIT ]
i should have called Caesar.

dance dance

i'll be here tonight



yay!


lots of shit happened these past couple weeks, which explains my lack in posts. and even more shit happening as i type. stay tuned.

think before you ink

amidst all the drama and stress, i had to find something to cheer me up.
hence, this post.

talk about die hard fans









and last but not least..



gross man

gimme

i want these

[ EDIT ]
hmm. these weren't the shoes that i originally posted up, but they're pretty fly too

street scene

i'll be here on sunday.

its my first year going cus for some reason i never liked the festival. maybe its the name, but whatever. you cant deny a good lineup. especially if it headlines the killers AND brand new. yayyy!



UPDATE:
simian mobile disco: dope, but you could only dance for so long on dirt and sawdust before your cant see or breathe

too short: a time killer turned in to one of my most memorable shows. what a funny guy.

brand new: amazing! although i preferred the crowd, venue, and general vibe/atmosphere at their glass house show, their set here was much better. who the hell thinks of screaming in their guitar?? still confuses me of how it works, but the shit sounds craaazy.

arctic monkeys: very, very nice live. it sucks, but their cd sounds like you're listening to one song on repeat the whole time, but they really deliver each song nicely at a live show

the killers: i was told previous to coming here that they put on an EPIC show. that word carries so much weight and expectations, but i am so glad to say that they were not hyped up AT ALL. although that brandon guy is one cocky mother, he honestly has a right to be.

excuse my lack of words for better descriptions, but im sleepy.
goodnight.

amazing

this chick is IIIINSAAAANE



she's an incredibly dope dancer (and my new found inspiration to become a better dancer), but her music choice is what puts her over the top for me. i love dancing hip hop, but dancing hip hop to shit like no doubt and yeah yeah yeahs is just ridiculous! it's the perfect merge of both my favorite worlds. [click for her vids]

mariel martin of funkanometry san francisco. youtube, myspace, recognize, respect.. cus she is goooood.

hello stranger

daaaamn its been a long time.

but the break was well worth it, cus im glad to say that i am OFFICIALLY done with my 3rd year of college! after takin a full course load over summer, i finally get to enjoy the few weeks left of it.

id update with all the shit that went down durin the time i was gone, but its 4:52am and im finally dead tired.

but before i leave...


look familiar??

yea..


maybe im just too pop-culturalized, but i came across the former in my art history class and the first thing i thought of was the BP rolling stones cover. after relentlessly trying to figure out if this issue's photographer david lachapelle was inspired by cindy sherman's work, i came out with nothing but the fact that miss BP "didnt want to be buttoned up." if only we knew.

btw, on a not so random note, if it werent for me getting a D in accounting and not qualifying for the business program, id never find my way to art history, which i love love love so much.

its funny how things work out.

vegas

FINALLY! i experienced the other (and much better) side of vegas!

pictures up soon

damn this game

i hate waiting.

not so random thought: i used to paint everyday a couple years ago and suddenly stopped. i dont know if it was because of time or self-consciousness but just lately ive been feeling the itch to start up again. this, im looking forward to. i utilize class time a lot, sketching a bunch of random shit. ive missed it so.
so once i get my hands on some canvases or the like, you can be sure to count on some less-emo posts. but till then, you'll be serving as the outlet for the tension :] thanks

new york: still up in air. thanks to a good friend, i got hooked up with a job. its temporary, but faast money so im grateful. ive been contemplating bartending for awhile, and/or maybe hooters. might as well put my girls to good use.

study calls.
so long.

what is this fascination

new york is postponed.

daaaaaaaaammnnnnn.

i was too damn excited to contain myself (as you can tell from the previous post), so at a family dinner at the OG i told my parents my well thought-out plans for ny. come to find they really want me to go to grad school considering i get free tuition thanks to good ole' george fuckn bush. ovbiously, grad school was the last thing on my to-do list. but now im not sure if i have a choice. money (or the lack there of) has always driven me to do some pretty drastic things in my life from basically demanding and getting a job to pocketing just about anything. so if i get money bein thrown at me, might as well take advantage of it. especially if its gonna make the parents happy at the same time.

another bright: at least i wont be hustlin for money till the death of me. but now im wondering if the drive will still be as lucid 2 years from now. cus its mostly times like these, this exact moment: 251am, itunes blasting, laptop burning, playing the waiting game for too many things to name that excites my drive to leave. and these moments are only getting lonelier and stronger. but i dread these moments as much as i love them. they kill me as much as i grow from them. and i curse them as much as im thankful for them. but i dont want to live with them forever. and the best solution ive come across so far is to get the fuck out before i come to terms with them.

ive grown such a liking to the idea of packing up and moving away from all the bullshit that i just dont want a better remedy to come up anytime soon. and adding another year only offers more hope for such.

so till then. we play the waiting game.

restless

schools a bust, and we all know that shit. it wasnt out of frustration, stress or laziness that almost convinced me to drop out, but the idea that i was wasting my time learning shit that i coulda taught to the damn class myself. i knew i could be doin something more beneficial to my career and myself rather than memorizing matrices or figuring out "why its wrong to manipulate and deceive others" like it isnt obvious already (business ethics is an oxymoron btw). yea, droppin out is a common thought in every student. but more so for shits and giggles. to me it was serious talk.

and thus, my new york dreams were conceived.

but not until today did i actually do some researching of what it'll take to seriously survive in the city and stop pretending that im gonna have the perfect "carrie" life. even though i wanted it more than anything, i was scared to shits (which is what prevented me from searching in the first place).. and even more so after hours of searching for cheap apartments, transit lines, and even safety tips. if it werent for my dead battery and the birds' chippity-chirpin outside my window id still be looking. but at least now i know where i stand. and ive never been more driven in my life.

in my relentless search to find anything under $800, i came across these two studios. which are both over $850.

option a) EBBETTS FIELD


option b) PATIO GARDENS


so assuming i find a job(s) that pays $25 an hour, work 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, i can afford one of these cute studios with some cash left over for food.
or shopping to decorate the space.

wish me luck :]

and if you have any suggestions, by all means, share that shit

r.i.p.

my high school espanol tres teacher passed away the other day. insane.
the obituary:

Brigham Vargas-Murillo, 35, passed away peacefully June 25, 2007, at his home in Adelanto. He was born May 12, 1972, in Torrance. Brigham wed Laura Perkins on May 6, 2006. He was a dedicated Spanish teacher at Silverado High School in Victorville. His dynamic personality and passion to have a positive influence on the lives of his students, colleagues and friends will be greatly missed. Brigham is survived by his loving wife, Laura; father, Jose Vargas of Costa Rica; sister, Elieth of Victorville; sister, Pryscila; brother-in-law, Marco; godchildren, Mario and Bianca of Costa Rica; father-in-law and mother-in-law James and Carleen Perkins of Whittier; many friends and his three boxer dogs, Papas, Zoie and Titan. Brigham will live in our hearts forever. Visitation will be from 4 to 8 p.m. Thursday at Kern Memorial Chapel, with a rosary beginning at 7 p.m. Funeral services will be at 1 p.m. Friday at St. Joan of Arc Catholic Church. Kern Memorial Chapel is handling arrangements.

sometimes you gotta let go, close your eyes, and let it crash

school's done THANK GOD. i love being home and not having a damn thing to do. its comforting kickin back and watching the golf channel with mom n dad, even though id rather be watching a top model marathon or HGTV. but its back to school in exactly one week for a full course load. no choice. and i shouldnt complain either. i got plans and i need to stick to them.

went disco dancing last night again. it was fun. if fun means a bust. for as long as ive been drinking, ive never done it for the sake of suppressing my emotions. once a relationship has that kind of effect on you, you know its time to take a step back and engage in some psychoanalytical investigation on your bathtub floor while the water beats out the alcohol from your skin.
never again will i/can i do that to myself. and i can always depend on my pride to hold me back.
the whole night didnt go to waste though. i still enjoyed myself plenty. having the usuals there as well as some new friends and also meeting a ton of interesting people made my night.

listen to: angie stone's i wish i didnt miss you anymore.
when people ask what song best fits your life right now, i never know what to say. i had this song up on my myspace just because i fell in love with it when i saw it being put to moves as super galactic's finale piece (get it, amador!). its just by chance that this song became so appropriate for right now.

on a less-emo note, here are some things im looking foward to:
-alan's 21st cocktail party in LA
-my very first cabinet meeting for 909
-dads birthday
-having time to finally complete my to-do list

hell week

finals can suck a big one. these past couple days have been a beating on my brain and body.
to help me get through the all-nighters:

music: rage against the machine
energizers: starbucks, and the ultimate necessity, chocolate!

this time around we chose dove and in every wrapper, you get to feast your mouth AND your mind. my favorites:

sexy

sometimes it's as simple as that

perfect

two bitches down, one to go.

support your local dance team

seems like all i post about is 909. oh fuckn well.





come support!

lucky ducky

second post of the day. means too much dilly-dallyin, not enough schoolin.
anway.

the man got the most amazing internship with warner music group couple days ago! it fits him so well considering how musically inclined he is. hes introduced me to an assload of artists that ive fallen in love with and will probably stay loyal to till i croak. and im sure its safe to say that the feeling's mutual. we met at ucr's orientation over summer, and our first real conversation other than "wow its hot out here" or "wow its really fuckin hot out here" was about the sprite liquid mix tour which we both attended. we got really riled up over it and since then, its been shows, his guitar and random conversations about music that brought us together. AND, for as long as it seems like ive known him, hes been making beautiful music. which is an even greater reason for why this internship is perfect for him.

artists under warner (of past and present):
AC/DC
Bjork
James Blunt
Boyz N Da Hood
Michelle Branch
Busta Rhymes
The Cure
The Darkness
Death Cab for Cutie
Missy Elliott
Fabolous
Garbage
Green Day
Kid Rock
Linkin Park
Madonna
Metallica
Morrissey
My Chemica Romance
The Velvet Underground
Murs
T.I.
Taking Back Sunday
Red Hot Chili Peppers
etc.

and may i add: there was only ONE position open. im quite jealous, but even more so proud. so, locals: stay posted. your favorite artist might possibly be promoting near you.

rock your body

and we thought we could finally breathe. hah.
at the last minute 909 got added on the bill for BODY ROCK which meant another week of late night practices and "oh fuck i woke up late again" mornings. 2 more days and it'll all be over with. and i write that with both relief and grief.

you can find me here this weekend. come say hi.

era 5.27

no school monday means party hard sunday.

havent been to era since me and the man went to go watch that crazy, sexy, cool mickey avalon character and that was way back when none of us knew what the hell era was. this time around we waited in line for 30 minutes just to move about 5 feet up the road and ended up paying a couple bucks more just to hurry up and get in. but it was well worth every pretty penny to spend a good ass night with some good ass company.